IT DOES MATTER - A WOMAN'S PERSPECTIVE

MODESTY - regard for decency of behavior, speech, dress; simplicity; moderation. Synonyms include constraint, inhibition, innocence, propriety, reticence, chastity.

In our modern world, modesty seems to be one of the concepts that we can give a dictionary definition for but have trouble defining in regards to our person. For several years society and the church were on the same page when it came to MODESTY, as many of our laws will reflect. Then we entered the era of “personal liberation” in which society deleted the word MODESTY from its vocabulary and seemed to be at war with the church. Sadly, enough, the church and society are closing the MODESTY definition gap once again and it appears that society is winning.

Many pastors have obviously made the decision, “why fight it, I’ll just ignore it or perhaps join it.” Others are so afraid of being called “legalistic” that they too have erased the word, modesty, from their vocabulary, sermons and Bible studies. It is becoming a lost Biblical truth and we are raising up a generation of young people who are not even aware that modesty is one of the Godly principles in the Bible.

This was made evident to me recently when I reposted the following conversation from a friend, “Me to Sweet-Young-Thing in her daisy-dukes & bikini top, "I love having you come over, but you are going to have to cover up. I'm keeping my house a safe place for my husband/boys eyes/hearts" long conversation ensued, followed by SWT- "I wish MY mom would keep our home a safe place for my dad’s eyes/heart". Train up a child....” Having raised two boys, I can totally relate to this mother’s heart. I, too, tried to keep our home a safe place for my son’s eyes and hearts because I knew there were too many unsafe places that would try to steal their hearts and minds from the things of God. This posting of course caused quite a stir. Many posted that they agreed but some disagreed and gave their reasons. The most prevalent disagreement was that men’s eyes, hearts and minds were their responsibility. Men must be mature enough to just say no and turn away. Why should women have any responsibility in the matter? We should be able to wear and show whatever we desire; it is our bodies and “guys, keep your eyeballs in your head!” Is this true? Does it matter what we as women wear? Am I my brother’s keeper? Is there a Godly principle that addresses this issue without going into legalism?

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 reads, “What? Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? 20For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.”

BIBLICAL PRINCIPLE #1: YOU ARE NOT YOUR OWN FOR YOU ARE BOUGHT WITH A PRICE. It doesn’t matter what society tells you if you have committed your life to Jesus Christ, you don’t have a right to do anything you choose to do with your body. This includes the places you go, the words that come out of your mouth, the things you put into your mouth, or up your nose, the things you put in front of your eyes, what you listen to with your ears, what you do with your hands (including inappropriate gestures) and yes, what you put on your body. Jesus paid a high price to redeem you and if you belong to Him the only right you have is to GLORIFY GOD in your body and in your spirit.

Romans 14: 13 says, “Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother’s way.” Verse 21, “It is good neither to eat meat nor drink wine nor do anything by which your brother stumbles or is offended or is made weak”

BIBLICAL PRINCIPLE #2: DO NOT DO ANYTHING WHICH CAUSES YOUR BROTHER TO STUMBLE, BE OFFENDED OR BE MADE WEAK. When we make a decision to join the Family of God, we are extended a privilege by God to become His sons and daughters, thereby gaining brothers and sisters. With privileges come responsibilities. One of our responsibilities is to help guard our sisters and brothers from stumbling. Now that does not mean that we have to lead them over every pitfall or be responsible for their actions but we MUST be responsible for our personal actions that could put a stumbling block in their path. Stumbling blocks could include sharing gossip or unseemly stories, inviting them to go with you to a venue that would feed their personal struggles and yes, even wearing articles of clothing that enhance or reveal body parts that could place impure thoughts in their minds. The comment was made that a lustful person is going to lust regardless of what another person is wearing. That is true but what about the young man who is struggling and is not mature enough to know how to say no? What about our husbands, sons, fathers or brothers who may be doing everything within their power to live a pure and Godly life? Biblical Principle #2 says, “Don’t make it more difficult for them by putting your scantily clothed body in their way.”

Exodus 20:12 “Honor thy father and mother.” Romans 12:10 “Be kindly affectionate one to another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another;” 1 Peter 2:17 “Honor all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king.” 1 Thessalonians 4:4 “That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honor.”

BIBLICAL PRINCIPLE #3: HONOR; WE ARE TO HONOR OUR FATHERS, OUR HUSBANDS, OUR BROTHERS, AND OURSELVES. Another word for honor is respect; we are to respect one another and respect ourselves. When we display ourselves in an immodest fashion we are disrespecting or dishonoring our Fathers, Husbands, Brothers and Sons. Also when a scantily clad woman displays herself in front of my Husband and Sons, it is dishonoring me. Furthermore, putting on clothing that would cause anyone to look at you with impure thoughts is dishonoring yourself.

My dear, dear sisters our clothing DOES matter. It’s quite simple, every morning ask yourself, “Does my ensemble displease or bring glory to God, would it cast a stumbling block in someone’s path and does it honor or dishonor the men in my life?” As women we will never get away from the desire to be fashionable, decorate ourselves with clothing unique to our personality and surround ourselves with beautiful things. That is exactly how God wired us. If the world was left up to our men we would live in a black, gray, and brown world. So go for it, bring out the beautiful colors and silky feminine fabrics, buy shoes to match and crazy handbags but don’t leave Godly Principles out of your selection.

Mary K. Mohler sums it up best, “May God give us both the desire and the wisdom to live lives that are holy in every aspect. A lost world is watching.”