WE'RE BROTHERS; SOMETIMES WE HURT EACH OTHER

Having raised two boys, it is no surprise to see 6-year old Caleb and 4-year old Nathan sword fighting, wrestling or playing “Superhero” in my living room; that’s what boys do!  I also remember how quickly “play” can escalate to the next level and become “fighting;” that’s what boys do!  Loudly, firmly and with authority, I said, “BOYS!!! That’s enough!  Someone is going to get hurt!”  Nathan paused just long enough to inform me, “It’s ok Grandma, we’re brothers, and sometimes we hurt each other.”  BOOOOMMMM!!!  He connects with the ball and Grandma gets it right between the eyes!  It always amazes me how your kids and grandkids can hit you with some truths using just a few simple words.

One of the things I have learned over the years is, the only people that can truly hurt you are the people you care about and have given that power over you.  It is the people to which you are the closest and most vulnerable; the ones you share your heart with or your innermost feelings.  These are the people whose opinions matter; your family, closest friends, your “brothers and sisters.”  A stranger can call me “fat, stupid and ugly and give me an obscene gesture, as I get out of my car and by the time I get from the parking lot to the store, I say, “whatevah" and forget about it.  Not so, if it comes from someone whose opinion I value.  The wounds and the scars can last a lifetime.

Stop a minute and look at the reverse side.  I know there have been many times that I have carelessly thrown a barbed dart while thinking, “its ok we’re sisters/brothers and sometimes we hurt each other.”  Then continued merrily along my way, never considering the damage my actions have caused.  IT’S NOT OK!!!  Listen to the words of Jesus in John 13:34-36 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. ³⁵ By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”  How will men know we are disciples of Jesus if we are constantly sword fighting, backbiting or wrestling for position and attention?  Are we trying to destroy those we love?  Picking and finding fault with each other and fighting with our words and deeds will eventually destroy relationships and prevent the blessing of God in your life.   Galatians 5:14 For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” ¹⁵ But if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another!

I may think it is cute for a 4 and 6 year old to stick their tongues out at each other; to wrestle and sword fight but there comes a time when we have to GROW UP!  Thankfully, my 34 and 36 year old sons don’t wrestle each other to the living room floor every time they get together.  The superhero capes and swords have been passed along to their children.  They can actually sit and have a civil conversation…most times.  It is time that we mature in our behavior toward our brothers and sisters in Christ.  It is time to put the swords down and STOP biting and devouring each other. 

 Psalms 133:1 Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!  I want a good and pleasant life, don’t you?  One of the best ways to have unity is to pray for your brother or sister.  When you are truly seeking the blessing of God for your brother or sister, you see them through a different lens and the desire for strife ceases.  Be DELIBERATELY ENCOURAGING.  If saying encouraging words to others does not come to you naturally, plan for it.  Pick the one person you seem to have the most difficulty loving and think of all the lovely, encouraging things you can say (even if you don’t want to); then SAY THEM!  The most important thing is when you are around others, SMILE!  A genuinely, warm smile can “mend a lot of fences” especially if it accompanies an “I’m sorry.”  I know it would bring a smile to God’s heart if just once He could hear his children say, “It’s ok God, we’re brothers and we LOVE each other.”