DON’T BAN THE “B, C, S, OR D” WORD, TRANSFORM THEM

Beyonce, Jennifer Garner and other prominent women are promoting the “Ban the B Word Campaign.”  They claim girls and young women are afraid to assert themselves and fulfill leadership roles for fear of being called “BOSSY,” therefore the word should be banned, allowing women to take their rightful roles in society. Is this a remake of the “Women’s Lib” movement of the 1960’s?  IMO, “Bossy” is the result of a character trait that has not been guided into the proper channels.  If you don’t want Hollywood Icons telling your children how to handle words or character traits, the step up, take charge of the role you assumed the moment that little girl or boy was born.

Having been born the oldest of 5 girls and, for the last 36 years, the mother of 2 boys, I will say that “Bossy” is not gender specific.  As in all characteristics, "Bossy," shows up in boys and girls, alike.  As a child, I was called “strong-willed.”  I was never called “strong-willed” in a positive light, so I grew up thinking that was a horrible trait that would cause me much grief over my lifetime.  Then I gave birth to a “strong-willed” little boy and it all became perfectly clear.  My problem was not being “strong-willed” it was learning how to submit that will to God and allow Him to use that character trait He had placed in me for His purpose.  Believe me, my “strong-will” has come through in some tough situations and help me to stand strong for the right things.  That “strong-willed” little boy has grown up to be a “strong-willed” man with a “strong-willed” little boy of his own.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.

Parents this verse doesn’t mean just taking your kids to Sunday School, saying meal and bedtime prayers with them and teaching them what NOT to do.  Training your child is allowing God to show you a glimpse of His plan for this precious little person entrusted to your care.  Let God do a work in your child’s life by guiding and molding all these wonderful character traits into tools to be used for His Glory.

God places certain character traits in each one of us to be nurtured and developed for His purpose.  If your child is BOSSY, help them to understand true leadership is not making everyone do what they choose but having a goal, planning and allowing others to contribute their ideas to reaching that goal.  If your child is STRONG-WILLED, don’t think you must “break” that will; instead teach them that being strong-willed doesn’t mean always doing what they want without regard to anyone else.  It means living a disciplined life, submitting their will to God’s will and being strong enough to not fall apart when He asks them to do the hard things.  If your child is COMPLIANT, help them to understand that there are many voices speaking into their life and you will help them to learn to listen and follow the ONE VOICE that loves them and has a great plan for their life.  If your child is a DRAMA-QUEEN/KING, recognize the positive aspects of their emotional traits.  They probably feel situations in a way that a calmer child does not experience.  Instead of becoming a “Drama-Parent,” turn the “drama” into compassion for others.  This child will probably be the one that will “weep with those who weep and laugh with those who laugh.”  God has some great adventures planned for your little Drama-Queen/King.

So while I agree that the word “bossy” is not a word that girls or boys desire to be labeled, having Hollywood Icons proudly declare, “I AM BOSSY!” is not what our children need to hear.  Families need mature, Godly Dads and  Moms that will recognize the character traits God has placed in their children and help nurture and develop them into strong, Godly young people. 

 Written by a Bossy, Strong-willed, Drama-Queen

YOU HAVE TO TRUST IN YOUR GUIDE

The “Kilimanjaro Warriors” recently reached the summit of the mountain after a grueling climb.  Several hundred make the challenging climb up the highest mountain in Africa every year.  What made this climb so unique and newsworthy?  The people belonging to the “Kilimanjaro Warriors” are wounded military veterans, many of which are amputees.  One of the climbers described the exhilaration of climbing the mountain and the agony of falling, skinned knees and the fear experienced as he descended.  He finished his story with these words, “The climb is not complete until you get to the bottom.”

The brave warrior’s words grabbed my attention, “The climb is not complete until you get to the bottom.”  Thinking over my life, sometimes it seems I have slid downhill a whole lot more than climbed the mountain.  That is impossible of course because you can’t go down the mountain unless you have already stood on the peaks.  So thinking about the times of climbing and descending in my life, I began to examine the differences between going up and coming down.  Why does the ascent seem easier than the descent?  Why does the anticipation of reaching the summit give you a kick of adrenaline but the exhilaration of reaching the goal swiftly fades as you make your way to the bottom?

When you are in the process of climbing, your focus is upward.  You can mark the progress and you reach a new “plateau” every day.  With every new height reached, you are met with a widening view of the scenery, a new experience, an exciting discovery; you overcome the challenges successfully because you want to reach the top.  You can see each ledge and toe hold clearly as you pull yourself up the mountain.  Finally you reach the summit and the whole world is laid out before you as your reward.  The air is clear, you can see for miles. Exhausted?  Yes, but the adrenaline kicks in and you are convinced that this place is where you were always meant to live.

After a few hours or days on top of the mountain, the granola bars just don’t satisfy, there are no streams from which to replenish your dwindling water supply, the exhilaration has waned and the view becomes familiar.  It is time to descend because in actuality your climb is only halfway complete.  The backpack is lighter now and suddenly you notice the “clear air” is really a strong wind that seems to relentlessly buffet your tired body.  The same path that you climbed up is the same path you will follow down but the footholds are backwards and seem less sure.  There are times when you must turn on your belly and blindly feel by faith, for the rocky ledge that was a welcome boost as you climbed upward.  Now, can you imagine being an amputee and going through this whole process.  You try to feel the rocky ledge but you have no feeling in your prosthetic limbs to tell your brain that you are on secure footing.  As the “wounded warrior” stated, “That’s when you have to trust your guide.”

Deuteronomy 31:8 And the Lord, He is the One who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you nor forsake you; do not fear nor be dismayed.”

Weary “Fellow-descender,” we all come to places in our descent from the peaks when we just have to TRUST OUR GUIDE.  He’s been down the mountain before; He knows the path.  You may feel as if you are dangling in midair on the side of a steep mountain but TRUST YOUR GUIDE.  You may have tripped and fallen, your knees may be raw and bleeding and you have lost sight of the summit’s beautiful panoramic view, but TRUST YOUR GUIDE. 

Finally you reach the bottom of the mountain and lie down in the soft warm grass.  A trickling brook promises cool refreshing waters and visions of a hot supper fill your mind.  You’ve made it; YOU’VE REACHED THE BOTTOM, THE CLIMB IS COMPLETE!!!

A SURRENDERED HEART IS NEVER DISAPPOINTED

“Bampa’s taking us to “Red Robster,” 3-year old Maicie excitedly informed everyone as we walked out of church headed for Sunday Dinner with the grandkids.  Is Red Lobster her favorite restaurant in the whole world?  Probably not, but she is 3 so everything and every place is an exciting adventure.  When Maicie is with Grandpa and Grandma she has complete faith in our love, our desire to do whatever is best for her and she knows we have special little surprise blessings just waiting to be bestowed upon her.  Maicie has completely surrendered her will to Grandpa and Grandma, so it doesn’t matter if it is Red Lobster or McDonalds, having her favorite book read to her or snuggling on Grandma’s bed watching a video, going to the Reptile Zoo or making valentines at the kitchen table; A SURRENDERED HEART IS NEVER DISAPPOINTED.

As I meditated, during morning devotions, my mind went back over all the many blessings in my life and the few disappointments.  God whispered sweetly to my spirit, “A surrendered Heart is NEVER disappointed.”  I began to examine each one of those disappointments and realized once again, God was right.  Every disappointment I have faced has been due to following my hopes and dreams instead of God’s plan, imagining the outcome I wanted instead of understanding God’s work in my life, or having expectations all for my benefit rather than furthering the Kingdom of God.  On the other hand every blessing I have received as a result of a Surrendered Heart has been lasting and never disappointing.  Proverbs 10:22 The blessing of the Lord makes one rich, And He adds no sorrow with it.

Lord, help me to have the Surrendered Heart of a 3-year old.  Every morning help me to awake with the excited expectation of the new adventures You have prepared.  I want to have complete faith in Your love and Your desire to do whatever is best for me; knowing that YOU are working all things for my good.  Whether it is “Red Lobster or McDonalds,” I want to feast at Your table; whether it is reading your Word or resting quietly in Your arms, I want to linger in Your presence.  If you want to show me the “Reptile Zoo” or have me share the Gospel at my kitchen table, I am available.   I desire Your will to replace my will and Your hopes and dreams for me to come to fruition.  Most of all, remind me that A SURRENDERED HEART IS NEVER DISAPPOINTED.

GOD ISN'T SEEKING GOLDEN STATUES

We watch Sunday’s game, feeling all warm and fuzzy when the athlete points Heavenward as he scores.  Miss America thanks God for giving her this platform to speak for Him and we cheer. Facebook, twitter and the rest of Social Media was recently bombarded by Believers, excitedly sharing the news that Megan Fox and Katy Perry had revealed that they believed in speaking in tongues.  We were told that we should not be judging their lifestyle choices because God looks on the heart and besides, THEY SPOKE IN TONGUES!!!!  In America, we have become so devoid of God in the Public Square, that when an actor says the word “God” other than in a swear word or an athlete crosses himself after a good play; we swoon with religious fervor or is it “fever.”  Well, here we go again…

Monday morning the News, Facebook, Twitter and other print media were all showcasing the most exciting event of the Oscar Award show; Matthew McConaughey, in his acceptance speech had raised his golden statue to Heaven and thanked God.  No mention of what that golden statue represented or what the actor had done to receive the award.  OH NO!!! The only thing that mattered is that he had said the word, “God!”  He went on to say, “He has graced my life with opportunities that I know are not by my hand or any other human hand.”  It sounds lovely but STOP!!!!  What god was Mr. McConaughey really thanking and by whose hand had the opportunity come?

 Matthew McConaughey won the Best Actor Oscar for his role in a movie entitled Dallas Buyer’s Club.  Since I did not see the movie, I investigated its content to try to understand what marvelous thing was being credited to God.  Dallas Buyer’s Club was of course rated R and contained moderate nudity, heavy language and sex.  It had a pro-homosexual world view, 186 obscenities, 21 strong profanities, 3 light profanities, extreme sexual content and sexual immorality, and drug usage.  Honestly, I found no mention of God in any of the online reviews, so I continued searching for the “OPPORTUNITIES” that Mr. McConaughey attributed to the Hand of God.  Here are some of the other movies he has starred in recently; maybe they will reveal a clue. Killer Joe, this movie was first rated NC-17 and had to be edited to receive an R rating.  Magic Mike is a movie about male strippers, which of course also carried the R rating.  Wolf of Wall Street also rated R and containing enough nudity, language and immorality to make just about anyone that had a conscience, blush.  Do we really think our Holy God was sitting on His throne just waiting for Matthew to raise his golden statue to Heaven and attribute such a collection of human depravity to His Hand?

All opportunities are not from God, as we read in Matthew 4:8-10 Again, the devil took Him up on an exceedingly high mountain, and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. ⁹ And he said to Him, “All these things I will give You if You will fall down and worship me.”  ¹⁰ Then Jesus said to him, “Away with you, Satan! For it is written, “You shall worship the Lord your God, and Him only you shall serve.”   Fame, riches and success are not necessarily, signs of the favor of God.  There is another voice that belongs to the “god of this world,” constantly luring and tempting us away from that which is pure and lovely by promising wealth, position, affirmation and recognition.  Learn the difference, do not mistake the voices of this world for the voice of God which asks for self-denial, taking up a cross, leaving our own success and following Him.

What about my life?  When I stand in the congregation, testifying of God am I bringing glory and attention to Him or merely raising a “Golden Statue of Personal Success?”  I believe every gift and talent we possess is bestowed upon us by our Creator.  But I also believe that every choice we make to use our gifts and talents does NOT automatically bring glory to the Giver of the Gifts.   God is really not impressed by the pathetic offerings we present to Him showcasing our efforts and success.  Revelations 4:10 the twenty-four elders fall down before Him who sits on the throne and worship Him who lives forever and ever, and cast their crowns before the throne.   He is filled with joy and we are truly only successful when we yield the gifts and talent back to the Creator and allow Him to use them in us to glorify Him and reach the hurting and broken.  When humbly at His feet, we present the souls that we have loved and ministered to and the people with whom we have been able to share the Gospel, we have offered the kind of genuine thanks our God will accept.

Psalms 56:16-17 For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it; You do not delight in burnt offering. ¹⁷ The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart—These, O God, You will not despise.  Does the God of Heaven desire our “golden” statues, the awards for our earthly accomplishments?  NO, He desires us; the award for HIS earthly accomplishments.

When you have faithfully followed after the Spirit, then you can raise your hands toward Heaven and truthfully say, “He has graced my life with opportunities that I know are not by my hand or any other human hand,” giving God the glory He deserves.  God isn’t looking for GOLDEN STATUES; He is seeking for those who will worship Him in SPIRIT AND IN TRUTH!!!