Between “tear breaks” I looked through old pictures;
pictures of an 18-year old couple beginning a life together, full of hopes and
dreams, yet to be realized. There were
snapshots of 2 kids holding a newborn baby and then 17 months later another
baby appears in the scene. Among the old
photos are those of loved ones that we miss so much and long to hold once
more. Jump to 2013 and there is that
newborn baby, all grown up, standing proudly with his wife and 3 beautiful
children and the other baby with his wife and 4 beautiful children. When did life happen and where did time
go? I had aspirations and dreams and
plans and goals; I want a do over!!!
There is an old country song with the lyrics, “I’d
like to be 16 again and know what I know now!” Have you ever felt that way? I certainly have! If I could only go back to 18 years old and Steve
and I could start our life all over. Oh
the things I would do differently. We
would certainly be rich because I would have sunk our entire fortune into
Microsoft and Wal-Mart, and then sold it all at just the right time. There are places we would not have moved to
and houses we would not have moved from.
I would have saved more, bought less and cut up the credit cards. More time would have been spent just talking
and laughing with those who have reached the finish line first. I would have sat on the floor and played
more, not caring about all the tasks I thought were priorities. I would have worried less and trusted more
because now I know of God’s faithfulness.
I WANT A DO OVER!
As I continue to reminiscence, God takes me on a journey
down memory lane. That life that seems
to have just slipped past was really busy and full and He was using every
moment to make me into the person He had planned. That first little house, with the toilet
falling through the floor was teaching me to be thankful for every blessing so
I would appreciate the brand new house 35 years later. Balancing the checkbook until payday and
returning pop cans for lunch money taught me thrift, the value of coupons,
cooking meals instead of fast food, using cloth diapers when everyone else had
disposable, helped me learn to be content for future times when the
checkbook would balance itself. I
learned that God is truly our provider and will use any means to bless us, even
if it means blowing something off of a roof and denting a car, giving us an
insurance check to pay a bill. God was
there gently instructing me as I sat in the dark night praying and holding a
little boy who’s nose wouldn’t stop bleeding; He is our healer. Through every storm, I learned that He is the
“Master of the Wind,” and only God can speak peace to my situation.
Back to my box of photographs; each one telling another
piece of my life’s story. How many of
the precious memories would simply disappear if I was granted a do over? What if I had always done the “sensible”
thing for the moment? I might have had a
great career with loads of money, a grand home and luxury car in the garage but
I would have missed those chubby little arms tight around my neck. We may not have moved to Michigan, Minnesota
and Tennessee and I would have avoided the struggles, the loneliness and the heartache
and the people we ministered to, the friendships and the adventures. We could have traveled the world but missed out
on Saturday trips to the beach, making a snowman in the front yard and playing
Yahtzee at the dining room table.
Suddenly the “Do over” isn’t quite so inviting and this
story of my life with all its many pieces is really quite wonderful. You don’t need a “Do over.” Allow God to take the scattered pieces, even
the ones you don’t think can possibly fit and put the puzzle of your life
together. That event you would change
creates a splash of color in the completed picture. The edge pieces are seemingly unimportant to
the overall theme but without them the puzzle remains unfinished. Your personal puzzle is not quite finished
but if you take a moment and look through God’s eyes you will see that life
really is quite a wonderful journey.
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