BEYOND THE "WHAT IF"

Tragedy has a way of making us reflect on our lives and reassess our priorities.  I am reminded today, that not only is life fragile but it is made up of moments in time.  There are moments of pleasure, joy, laughter, sorrow, pain and intense grief.  At times the moments seem to last for eternity but then there is a new moment to take its place.

Reflecting on tragic moments, I am always struck by the exact timing required to make the moment happen and the question that follows, “What if?”  Several years ago, a young lady my boys knew from school, was home from college for the weekend.  Her sister had attended the Homecoming Dance and an after dance party.  Sometime after midnight the elder sister went to pick up the younger.  On the way home, a young man who had been drinking ran a red light and the girls were killed instantly.  WHAT IF the timing had been just one minute earlier or later?  WHAT IF they had lingered just a little longer at the party?  WHAT IF one driver had been driving a little faster or slower?  The “what if” could have made all the difference in “what was” but it didn’t so we are left with the question.

Six years ago, I received a call from my husband saying he had been involved in a fatal accident.  A motorcycle had sped up around a semi just as Steve was pulling out of a McDonalds.  The motorcyclist hit Steve’s truck broadside at a speed of about 80 miles per hour and was killed instantly.  WHAT IF?  We struggled with the “what ifs” for a long time.  WHAT IF he had not taken the exit and stopped at that McDonalds?  WHAT IF he had paused an extra couple of seconds and taken one more look?  WHAT IF the motorcyclist had been going the speed limit?  Is there peace beyond the “what ifs?”

Yes, life is made up of moments and full of “what ifs.”  It seems the “what ifs” are more difficult to get past then the actual event.  Until the “what ifs” are dealt with, it is impossible to move on to a new moment.  So how do we move past the “what ifs?”  First we must recognize the past cannot be changed but the future is still being written.  Give yourself a break; if it something that needs to be forgiven, give it to Jesus.  Receive His forgiveness, and then forgive yourself.  If it involves something that was beyond your control, accept your limitations and put your trust in the One who is strong in our weakness.  Last of all look to the future and allow God to take all the “WHAT IFS” and use them for your good.  In all the moments of life, He is still God and He wants to be God of the “WHAT IFS.”