2011 REFLECTIONS; WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN; WHAT WAS; WHAT IS TO COME

The worn calendar of 2011 has come to the end of its usefulness; there are no more pages to be turned and only 3 more days to mark off.  It is time for reflection on “What could have been; what was, and what is to come.” 

It really began December 31, 2010, celebrating with many people I love and had come to love.  Yes, where else?  CHURCH!!!  I love being in a church service on New Year’s Eve.  It is so joyful, so full of promise.  There is always great food, fellowship and so much love; this service was all that and more.  The music was beautiful; the worship dynamic, Steve preached a “forward-looking” sermon and presented the agenda for the coming year.  The power of God fell in the service, people were renewed in the Spirit and we had the general feeling that “God was well pleased.”  My humanness reflects and says, “If only it had ended there,” but my spirit man understands I still need some “testing and proving.”

I hear so many people expressing how happy they will be to wave goodbye to 2011 and welcome 2012 as the clock strikes midnight.  Really, does a minute in time or a page on a calendar make the difference?  Or is it all the experiences over the last 525,600 minutes of 2011 that will carry you into 2012 with a different perspective.

Once again in human terms, 2011 was not one of my best years.  It was full of tears, brokenhearted nights, unbelievable stress, depression, previously, unexperienced health problems, endless hours on my knees, answered and unanswered questions.  In spiritual terms, however, 2011 was a GREAT year, full of blessing and amazing encounters with God.  It is not the EXPERIENCE that makes the difference; it is how you “COME OUT” on the other side of the experience.  What did I learn?  How did I handle the situation?  Have I been changed into the person God needs me to be?  Or, am I bitter?  Do I blame everyone including God?  Have I become vindictive?  Will I remain unchanged and have to go through the “fire” again?

Reflections on what I have learned in 2011

When God says, “I will never leave you or forsake you,” He means it.  The distance between you and God can increase only if you move away.

Always go into the year with anticipation and dreams but be willing to allow God to shape, mold and change the dream.  Realize that there was nothing wrong with your dream; it may remain unfulfilled due to timing, outside circumstances or uncooperativeness.

Remain soft and pliable in the Master’s Hands.  It may be tempting to put up a shell to avoid being hurt again but nothing hurts worse than God breaking through the shell to get to our heart.

Faith is not just asking, believing it hard enough, and then receiving it.  Faith is praying about the situation, believing that God is well able, accepting that the outcome is in God’s hands, and LEAVING it there.

And finally My Friends; Trust in the promises of God; Ask Him to show you everything He is trying to teach you in the midst of the storm; Rest in His peace; and Allow Him to choose the ending blessing.

As the clock strikes midnight, closing out a year of unbelievable heartache and unbelievable blessing, I carry a resolve into 2012.  I resolve to enjoy every moment, whether through laughter or tears, knowing God is working.  I resolve to let the Love of God shine brighter through my life than ever before as I walk out in a dark world.  I resolve to seek after, listen to and follow as God leads me down the path He has prepared for me to walk in.  I resolve to LAUGH LOUDER, JUMP HIGHER and PRAISE MORE FERVENTLY than I did in 2011.

I HAVEN'T WALKED THIS WAY BEFORE

During the last 3 months. I have experienced several things in my life I had never before experienced.  The stress and pressure has been tremendous and at times debilitating.  Through it all, God has been an ever present help.  Because of the stress and strain, I feel I have temporarily lost my writing voice.  I am filing notes and I know that God will restore it at the proper time.  Please pray for Steve and I as we relocate and begin to walk down a totally new and unfamiliar road. 

With God's help, I will begin to write again.  I know it is in there fighting to come out.  I love you all my readers.  God's richest blessings to all of you.

WHEN THE DREAM IS ALIVE AFTER HOPE HAS DIED

Throughout our lifetime we dream of what we can accomplish, the things we will acquire and who we will share our life with. Our ability to dream never completely goes away, although the dreams may mature or be replaced with more realistic expectations. As a little girl, I wanted to be a bride and have babies just like my mom. During a revival, I dreamed of being an evangelist’s wife, wearing high heels and playing an accordion. After attending my first gospel concert, I wanted to be a professional singer and tour the United States, performing nightly for my adoring fans. At eighteen I married prince charming, wore the high heels, had the babies and sang in the church choir. Some of my dreams have been fulfilled in ways I could not have imagined, others took their place in the distant past of a little girl’s fantasy, and a few of the dreams lingered in the future still waiting to be realized. What do you do when you wake one day with a living, breathing dream but recognize that the hope of bringing it to fruition has died?

In the Bible we read the story of David. We are first introduced to the Little Shepherd Boy, David. He tended his father’s sheep, played music on his harp and sang songs praising God. Every child knows the story of David coming against Goliath with a simple sling, five stones and his faith in God. As he became a man and won many battles for Israel, we learn that he was anointed King of Israel. He triumphed, he sinned, he repented, he wrote Psalms to the Lord and danced before the ark as it was carried back to its rightful place. God blessed David throughout his life, and promised that his house would be established forever. It would appear that every desire of his heart had been fulfilled, but there was one dream that David would never live to see accomplished. The dream was alive but for David, hope had died.

In 1 Chronicles 17, we read about David’s dream; “Now it came to pass, as David sat in his house, that David said to Nathan the prophet, Lo, I dwell in an house of cedars, but the ark of the covenant of the LORD remains under curtains.” David had a dream of building a house of worship to the Lord. A house that would hold the Ark of the Covenant; a house that would honor the God that he loved and for whom he had written some many Psalms of praise; a house that would bring attention to the God of Israel. Nathan, the prophet, agreed that it was a wonderful idea. 1 Chronicles 17:2 says “Then Nathan said unto David, Do all that is in thine heart; for God is with thee. What could possibly be wrong with this desire to honor God? In verse 4, God tells Nathan, “Go and tell David my servant, Thus saith the LORD, Thou shall not build me a house to dwell in.” For David, hope of building a magnificent house to glorify God had died. He would not live to see the Glory of God fill the temple at the dedication service, it would never be called, “David’s Temple,” but the dream was not yet dead. In 1 Kings 5:5, we learn that God told David, “Thy son, whom I will set upon thy throne in thy room, he shall build a house unto my name.”

What did David do when he finally realized that the hope of accomplishing what he had dreamed of was dead? Did he get angry, give up on God, or stop being King? No, we find that David continued being king and he continued to trust God for victory over the enemy. Instead of feeling sorry for himself, he began to dedicate the spoils of war to God and amass many of the materials that would be used in building the temple, its furniture and vessels.

There are times in our lives that we must face the reality that a dream is never going to develop as we had envisioned and hope dies. Don’t give up; perhaps you were given the dream for a purpose. What if your purpose all along was to be the “David” to “Solomon” in God’s plan? Perhaps that youthful dream of being a professional ballplayer was given to you so that you would coach the little league team of the next all-star pitcher. The exalted dream of “Making a difference in the world” took a course beyond your wildest imagination and you made a difference by nurturing and raising the little boy or girl who would go on to preach the gospel to a people who had never heard of Jesus. The dream of pastoring a mega church wasn’t just a pipe dream, you were given the dream to be the planter or the waterer and God will give the increase to the next generation. Next time you use that hairbrush as a microphone, remember, your voice was always meant to glorify God rather than be the next American Idol.

1 Corinthians 3:6-8 “I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase. 7So then neither is he that plants anything, neither he that waters; but God that gives the increase. 8Now he that plants and he that waters are one: and every man shall receive his own reward according to his own labor. “You may not see the completion of the dream but God may use you to be an important component of the end product. Maybe you will be the one that proposes the idea, or the one that assembles the materials or people. The dream may not stand as a living memorial to you and no one may ever even realize that you were the one with the idea, but God put the dream into your heart for a purpose and He will accomplish it in His way; in His time.

MIRACLE BABY SOSHEA BROOKLYN

This testimony absolutely must be shared. Baby Shea is the daughter of Jon and BreAnna Hedlund and the granddaughter of our friends John and Darlene Soshea of Duluth, MN. As soon as it was posted on FB that Baby Soshea was in trouble, an Army of Prayer Warriors was marshalled around the world to bombard Heaven with nonstop petitions on behalf of Brea and Baby Shea. God is still on the throne and prayer still works. Here is their story.

By BreAnna Hedlund

Baby Shea was born August 30th @ 9:22pm....an emergency c-section! She was born having oxygen deprivation "Birth Hypoxia".......my lil girls heart stopped, had to do chest compressions, and really her outcome did not look well..... she was flown down to Amplatz Hospital within the 6 hour time period to be put on a cooling blanket. Mommy was waking up for surgery and didn't understand why her baby was being taken away. I want to tell you the survival stats....

Up to 62% die or have moderate to severe disabilities
Up to 30% have cerebral palsy
Up to 14% blind
Up to 6% are hearing impaired

My baby girl did not look good but we were going to fight, we were going to try this cooling blanket to hopefully slow down the damage this would have on her...... she was put in hypothermia mode for a full 72 hours... extremely hard for a mother and father to watch. Then after the 3 days she was slowly warmed back up, only to find that she was having a lot of problems. She had an EEG to check and see what all this damage of the oxygen deprivation had on her and if the cooling blanket was able to help at all...... our results were extremely horrific, the doctor called us both to her bed side and said, I do not have good news. Her test came back with EXTREME abnormalities, and we talked about all the things that this meant, horrible. the Doctor said we will run another test on Tuesday but at a max it may improve a little but it is so extremely abnormal I am so sorry to have to tell you....I asked is it possible that it could come back normal and she said I hate to say it but NO. I was crying and couldn't even stand, my baby girl this was not what I wanted to hear.

The next 3 days was long...... watching your lil girl with so many things we could already see that werent normal.... we decided that we were not going to accept this report from the doctors.... i couldn't...i knew a God that could heal my precious angel.... so we had already asked for prayers from around the world and asked for many more.... we had many prayers go up for her.... and for those of you that took the time to do so we are so extremely grateful to you for your prayers.... in these three days we had a prophetic word and vision of her given to us about her healing....and signs and signs of her healing! We wanted to see her healed today, but God knew his timing! The day before her test she still was having a lot of trouble, we weren't seeing any improvements, but continued in our faith! Tuesday came and she had her test, it took longer then the first one, the results took what seemed like forever! Finally the Doctor came to her lil bedside and said "I have amazing news for you guys, the EEG came back completely NORMAL!!!!!!!" How could this happen? I screamed, cried, fell to the ground thank God my husband was there, we really received this miracle that we had prayed and hoped for! Thank you GOD!!!!

We would like to send a special thank you to ALL of our Family for their support, love and visits! With out all of you and God we could not have made it through all this! Thank you for all the prayers, the fasting, and prayer nights that were held....we can not begin to express our gratitude! I want everyone to know that its all your prayers that the Lord heard! :) We want you to know all the texts, calls, facebook messages were a true blessing, we apologize we have been so busy with this we have not had a chance to respond. We appreciate all of you! Love you and we will continue to post her progress, she still has a little ways to go to get out of this but she is a MIRACLE! Thank you dear Lord for our Baby Soshea Brooklyn Hedlund!

HYPOCRITICAL CHANCE OR GLORY TO GOD OPPORTUNITY

One of the easiest ways to stick a knife in the heart of a professing Christian is to accuse them of being a hypocrite. At one time or another, every Christian has heard the statement, “And you call yourself a Christian!” Sometimes the question is deserved, other times it is just used against us because we tried to do the right thing and it made someone else feel guilty.  “Hypocrite” comes from the Greek word, “hypokrites” a stage actor or one who pretends to be what he is not. The church has been accused of being full of hypocrites and when you think about it, where else would they be? A person who does not believe in anything and doesn’t behave as if they believe in anything would never be accused of being a hypocrite and most likely never be found attending church. So, while the church may be full of hypocrites, most of us are just human trying to become more like Jesus.

Once you claim the Name of Jesus and have the courage to open your mouth, profess what you believe and align yourself with the Church, a test will present itself. Now the choice is yours, do you take the chance to be viewed as a hypocrite or is this an opportunity presented by God to give Him glory.

I will never forget an opportunity that came my way, many years ago. I had made a quick run to the neighborhood grocery store and as I unloaded the groceries into the trunk of my car, I noticed the cashier had put a gallon of milk into my cart that I had not purchased. My first thought was, I’m in a hurry, I have two little boys at home so praise God for the blessing and after all I didn’t put it in my cart. But God’s voice came through loud and strong, “you didn’t pay for it, someone else did” and “it isn’t your milk, it belongs to someone else.” I decided to do the right thing and bring glory to God even if no one would ever know. Back into the store I went with the gallon of milk. I gave it back to the cashier and explained that I had not paid for it so it must belong to someone else. She thanked me and as I turned around to go back to my car, I looked up into the eyes of my pastor. You never know who may be watching. There have been other opportunities of receiving too much change, keeping my mouth shut when I wanted to lash out or telling the truth although I knew the outcome would not be in my favor. Have I ever made the wrong choice and took the chance to be a hypocrite? Oh yes, but I would prefer not to talk about them and I have had to repent many times.

I believe that God tests us, not to prove anything to Him but to make us stronger and give us confidence that through the power of the Holy Ghost, we can overcome any obstacle that comes our way. This week I was again presented with the opportunity to act upon what I had professed. In the last month my husband and I have been put through a very hard and hurtful trial. It was not something we asked for because we were only trying to faithfully serve God. I believe that “all things work for the good of them that love the Lord and are the called according to His purpose,” so with my mouth I professed the goodness of God and prayed for blessings upon those that had come against us with falsehoods and indifference to the will of God. It is all fine in theory but sometimes a different story when put to the test. I received word that God was sending someone to bless them this weekend. The feelings of hurt and frustration threatened to overtake me so I did the only thing I knew to do; fall on my knees in prayer. Would I curse, blame and run down the people who had done me wrong and take the hypocritical chance or would I bless, encourage, pray for them and bring glory to God. It took some wrestling back and forth but I chose to be a blessing to others and receive a blessing from God.

Every day you will be presented with choices that will satisfy your flesh or feed your spirit. If you choose to satisfy your flesh you may have to wear the label of Hypocrite but if you choose to feed your spirit and bring Glory to God, you will be blessed and wear the label of Overcomer. Revelations 21:7 He that overcomes shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son.

JUST A BAND-AID

Each of us have had wonderful things occur in our lives, when we want to leap for joy and shout praise at the top of our lungs. Maybe it was the time your husband came home from work with news of a big promotion and raise to match. Perhaps after years of hoping, the test came back positive and it was time to start painting the nursery. It could be signing the papers on your dream house, watching your grandchild do amazing things that you thought were disgusting when your son or daughter did them, a new car, earning a degree or any number of things that make your heart sing for joy. You open up the Word of God and read in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” You are convinced, God is good, His will is full of blessing and you give thanks.

Now we fast forward to an event that drives you to your knees; your husband loses his job, your hopes are shattered and there will be no baby to fill your empty arms, maybe the house is repossessed, the car is totaled or your child has once again broken your heart. You open the Word of God and read in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” Are you still convinced that God is good, can you trust that “all things work for good,” do you still give thanks?

Sunday marked the 10th anniversary of the terrorist attacks that took place on September 11, 2001. As I watched the 2001 live footage of the towers in flames, people jumping out of windows and heard the stories repeated of heroic acts of bravery, I was instantly transported back to the very moment I learned of the attack. The forgotten memories of horror and grief came flooding back as the tears stream down my face. The names of the thousands that lost their life that day included, without discrimination, fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, husbands, wives, friends, ministers, secretaries, CEO’s, firefighters, policemen and caring citizens. Could anyone find comfort in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you?”  Did God still care; if so, where was He; how could any good come from such a hate-filled act, could we still give thanks?

Among the fascinating stories told of that Tuesday morning in September, are the tales of “If not for the Grace of God.” For one person, a car wouldn’t start, another arrived at the corner just as the taxi pulled away, yet another was held up in a traffic jam caused by an auto accident, an alarm clock did not go off, the phone rang just as she opened the door; were they just “lucky” or are these everyday happenings that we never think about unless a tragedy of 9/11 proportions occurs? The story that impacted me this morning was that of a man that had put on a new pair of shoes. As he walked toward the World Trade Center, he realized a blister was forming and he stopped at a drug store to purchase a Band-Aid. Yes, an aggravating blister and the need for a band-aid saved his life that day. I’m sure if this man opened his bible and read 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you,” he suddenly had a clear understanding of its meaning and he gave thanks.

Never again will I grumble at the slow car on the highway in front of me or the traffic light that turns red just as I approach; I will breathe a prayer of thanks when the phone rings at an inconvenient time or I get behind the coupon queen in the grocery line. You and I will probably never know the times we have been saved by the things we viewed as a nuisance. Dear God, please remind me when I start to complain about being late that your Word tells me “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”

IT WAS ENOUGH JUST TO BE YOUR MOM

I POSTED THIS BLOG IN DECEMBER 2010.  AFTER READING POSTS ON FACEBOOK REGARDING STAY-AT-HOME MOMS, I FELT I SHOULD POST IT AGAIN.  I AM NOT JUDGING ANY MOTHER THAT MUST WORK OR CHOOSES TO WORK OUTSIDE THE HOME; THESE ARE JUST MY THOUGHTS AND EXPERIENCES.

It is no secret that I am a Facebook junkie. I love keeping up-to-date with friends and family. One of the things that I have avoided getting involved in is the “Mass Group Posts.” To me they are similar to the old “chain letters.” Some even go as far to tell me if I don’t post a certain paragraph, I am denying Christ before the world. Never mind the life I live, it’s all about posting a specific saying. A couple of weeks ago, this particular post caught my eye: “I work 24/7. I'm a MOMMY, I'm a cook, a cleaner, a parent, a teacher, a referee, a nanny, a nurse, a handyman, a maid, a shrink, security & a comforter. I don't get holidays, sick pay, or A DAY off. I work through the day & some of the night, on call at ALL hours. I'm underpaid & overworked. Now tell me that YOUR job is harder than mine! Repost this if you're a great mommy ♥.”  I did not repost the item but I couldn’t resist commenting.

I was a full time mommy for 20 years, I never considered myself underpaid. OVERWORKED? Maybe, but I just didn’t consider it in monetary terms. You see, to me, Motherhood was NOT a JOB but a CALLING which I chose to follow. Although this calling did not bring great wealth, it was not without great reward. I will never forget the feel of little arms around my neck and the sound of a tiny voice saying, “Mommy I “wuv” you. What mother hasn’t paused for a few moments just to watch her babies sleeping like angels and wishing she hadn’t said “not right now” so many times that day. There is nothing like seeing 2 little shining faces emerge after a warm bath, snuggling with them in their cozy “jammies” and inhaling that soft baby smell. As they grew older, I loved listening to their funny adventures, discovering the world through their fresh eyes and guiding them through the “teenage jungle.” I have enjoyed being a Mom in every stage of their life. As far as overworked, that is what I bought into when I chose to have kids. They have been worth every sleepless night, every hour lost, and every dollar that I could have been spending on myself.

I know how Mary must have felt when she held Jesus in her arms for the first time. I’ve experienced the overwhelming love that pours from your heart as you rock the tiny helpless little baby. But, did she feel “used” when she knelt at the cross? Did she feel underpaid and overworked when she came to the end of the road with her son? Did Mary complain, “I cooked, cleaned, taught you, dried your tears, washed your clothes, was always there for you and this is the reward I get?” Luke 2:19 tells us, “But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.” Perhaps at the end she reached into her heart for all the sweet memories and murmured through her tears, “It was enough just to be your mom.”

Yes, there were times I was privileged to teach them new things, referee their disagreements, bandage skinned knees, and provide clean clothes and delicious meals. I’m thankful they trusted me enough to take my counsel instead of learning life’s lessons on the playground and that they knew their home was a safe place where they could always be comforted. Being an important part of my sons’ lives as they grew to be men who love God, love their families and still love their mom has been all the pay I required. Steven and Philip, it was enough just to be your mom.